Monday, October 13, 2008

In My Absence.

Happy Columbus Day, all!!

My apologies for being absent these past several days. (Or weeks) Things have been quite busy here in the womb, and I had no idea that I had "fans" or that people "Wanted to hear more from me." 

I have been informed otherwise, and will never let you down again. If I should disappear for any extended period of time , it is only because my parents have neglected to log me into ye olde interwebs, and left me to fend for myself with a pad and paper like some kind of commoner. Scratching my thoughts like so much drivel to be transcribed later, most likely with numerous mistakes in the transcription.

On that note, my parents were staying in a hotel this weekend, and my father thought it clever to rename the hotel's internet desktop icon to "Ye Olde Interweb" Mother saw it later, and remarked that it was quite similar to what my father called the internet.  She didn't realize, however, that he was the one who did it. We all had quite a chuckle at the situation, and enjoyed our little bit of humor. 

How quaint.  

I have been doing some traveling as of late, and I assigned a guest blogger to continue writing. I thought that I could entrust him with my much-loved fan-base, but alas he was not to be trusted. He was a man that I believed possessed the character, moxie and gumption that I thought necessary to provide my adoring public with its periodic doses of humor, information, and philosophical fodder, among other things. He was a man that I thought I could count on to make sure that the public was kept abreast of the situations that I was involved in, and really, it wouldn't have been so bad if the blog.

Let's call this man "Dad".

While I will let him off the hook this time, I believe his irresponsibility may have cost me fans, and above all, may have deprived you all of that which you hold dear: Blogs from me.

"Dad" (If that is his real name....I am skeptical, as no naming patterns I have researched have shown the name "Dad" to appear anywhere in common naming conventions. However, in my research, I have noted many people to have been named in this fashion. This leads me to be suspicious in both his motives and tactics for furthering them. Further research into Anglo-Saxon naming conventions will hopefully reveal the crucial key that I am missing)

Where was I....Oh yes...."Dad" has been summarily punished for his lapse in writing by having his apartment filled to bursting with many gifts and accoutrements for me. I feel just dreadful that Mother also is forced to climb over 216 boxes of diapers  and other various baby items to get to anything useful for adults, but she is what we like to call "Collateral Damage" in these cases. Mea culpa mater....


The most recent doctor's visit....who will I be mocking, and  calling out for denying me ice cream THIS WEEK?!?

A Halloween wedding...what did mom go as to include me in the festivities???? What was Dad's favorite costume!??!

My Mom's baby shower...what did we get? What was everyone wearing? What was Dad's deal with dropping food on himself and others AFTER someone gave him a plate and he stopped eating directly out of the food trays....

Classy, Dad...real classy.

STAY TUNED!! I'm back, ya'll!!!!!


tmheffer said...

I would advise you keep a close watch on this "Dad" person. He seems like trouble to me.

The Dot said...

Thank you for the heads-up. He already has my hackles up, by God. I'm glad to know it's not just me.

Anonymous said...

I want to know more! Dot, don't leave us all hanging like this! It's cruel!
P.S. Love web address.

The Dot said...

My apologies for the cliffhanger. I had just recently learned about it, and wanted to see if it worked as well as everyone really does!

The Dot said...

PS-Thanks for loving the web address. :-)